Abuse: The Gift That Keeps On Giving

Abuse, like charity, begins at home.  From the beginning, culture and civilization have been about occupation and entitlement.  Control and power. 

From the perspective of those who are entitled, the problems begin when those they wish to control do not go along with the perceived power and perceived entitlement.

Derrick Jensen, author of Endgame, summarizes the root of all evil.

It all comes down to perceived entitlement...Entitlement is the abuser’s belief that he has a special status and that it provides him with exclusive rights and privileges that do not apply to his partner.  The attitudes that drive abuse can largely be summarized in this one word.

The world is merely a reflection of the inner workings of beliefs perpetuated in families, cultures, and communities everywhere.

For years, I’ve not only been fascinated by those who seek power and control through war and claim God as their motivator and leader, but equally, by atheists who fall for this claim of a manipulative, skilled abuser. 

At odds in the ring?  The controller, the occupier, the entitled, the “believer” vs the atheist.  Fighting for God or against God?  “God starts more wars than anyone or thing.”  Really?

This is the same logic and brain-washing accomplished by all abusers.

  

When all else fails, blame God?  The occupations continue.  In fact, they grow.  Land ravaged.  Human rights violations and atrocities occurring practically unwatched and virtually ignored.  Neglect, abuse, horror flourishing.  

Atheists blaming, in fact, reflecting, exactly what the abusers have manipulated and orchestrated.  Essentially, buying into the brain-washing.  

Abusers change the game and they do it better than anyone.  Parasites and predators.  Diverting with words and smokescreens   Abusers accomplish this in their sleep.

Words are there to protect the perpetrator.  Actions must be the focus.  Like occupation of a country, the entitled will provide rhetoric, change the story, blame anyone or thing (obviously), to act.  Stealth attacks through incessant, hypnotic ramblings and encouraging friendly fire.  Control, domination and power are the goals.  

The irony is that while believers and non-believers fall for the same scapegoat, abusers provide a reason to in-fight while they continue raping and pillaging.  It’s what abusers do.  The abuse continues.  Abusers skillfully manipulate reality and we find that we blame anyone nearby.  

Essentially, abusers encourage uncertainty and instability.  They have followers doubt their own sanity and memories.  It’s a cruel irony.  The sane and sympathetic are anxious, uncertain, seeking leadership, and may succumb to being lost.  Abusers give a subtle mission to the prey and victims they wish to make accomplices:  find a “reason” for the chaos and turmoil.  Place blame.  It keeps everyone busy while the abusive occupy, take, and control more.

In the world of warfare, believers and non alike blame God?  I’m pretty sure that whether you follow a preacher or not, you may want to consider who everyone is following?  Abuse is not isolated and with our help and submission, the abusers have made it almost invisible.

What do you think?

Does “Faith” Freak You Out?

Perhaps, I lost you at the word.  Faith.

Originally, “faith” had nothing to do with “religion”. 

See also:

Strong belief.  Loyalty.  Acceptance.  Constancy.  Truth.  Trust in someone or something.  Allegiance to duty or person.  Fidelity to promises.  Sincerity of intentions.  Strong conviction.  Confidence in a person or thing. 

Strong, weighty word.  Redefined through history and encumbered with a load that it did nothing to deserve.

My feeling is...what a loss.

The word has been translated by the very language that created it. 

With some, the fear of the word is palpable.

Mindfulness is about clarity.  Removing judgment. 

Science needs clarity to practice science.  Science, itself, will be greater when we clear our heads (our thoughts), bring awareness to our language (word), and follow through with unbiased action (experimentation).  When we perceive threats, in a spoken word, we elicit a fight or flight response.  We function from our primitive brain.  We react.

People have had “faith” in placebos.

Faith existed long before religion.

The English Language lost a weighty word to its “evolved” meaning.

I want to start a movement.  Save “faith”.  In fact, “keep the faith”.  Fear leads to paranoia and so much more. 

Let’s get mindful with our words.  We have enough judgment leading to dissension.  I’d like to kidnap “faith” back from the battle zone of religion (more on that at another time).

Will you join me in a “leap of faith”...an “act of faith”?

Maybe, what we really need to change is judgment and fear?  What are we afraid of?

Used as it was originally prescribed, faith sure sounds like a source of peace and tranquility.

The Face of a Woman

Great #art project addressing #sexism and cat calls. Written comments are even more telling. pic.twitter.com/ofC6bcAwV1
— YK Hong (@ykhong) March 9, 2013

In June, I discovered this tweet.  I haven't stopped thinking about it.  Yesterday was Women's Equality Day.

Since spotting this tweet, I can't tell you the number of times I have been going about my business, carrying the loss of my mother and other enormously back-breaking life events with me, and I've been told to smile or somehow alter the somber expression on my face.  

Then, it occurred to me, this has often happened to me throughout my life on the rare occasion I wasn't smiling.  I never really thought about it.

On a daily basis, I am the first person to smile.  I'll greet you, smile and say "how are you?"  I am delighted to listen and hear more.  I am joyful and inquisitive.  My greatest joy is to brighten a person's day.  I approach everyone first with, of course, a smile.  

I like to carry a smile with me and "share the bug".  

But, there is more to a smile that is undeniable.  There is a history to smiling that is often not acknowledged.  There was a time when "football players never smile" was freely spoken, understood, and admired.  Honest and humorous.  I think we were safer then. 

There is no one who believes more in joy, love, peace, and compassion than I do.  However, this beautiful piece of art, remembered again on Women's Equality Day, reminds us that, sadly enough...smiles are not equal.  

In some cases, with heads and hearts that hold dark thoughts, a smile, on The Face of a Woman, can be an invitation, seen as a flirtation, to disaster.

Smile...and be mindful.  Remember those who can smile freely when they are happy and remember those who may be told to smile.  And never forget those who when they did smile, as they were told, may later face an accusation that since they did smile, they "asked for it".

We still have not reached equality when a woman's, or girl's, smile of innocence may not be treated for what it is.  In 2013, it would be politically incorrect to say so.  

Attitudes can be held in darkness...or behind a smile.

Prejudice? Read the label...

It SAYS "Chunky", but buyer beware?

Chunky or creamy?  Which one are you?  Maybe, you can swing either way?

Me?  I'm a chunky.  Or...no peanut butter at all, thank you.  Ya.  Pretty uptight and inflexible, I know. I guess we all have our "things".

I've been thinking a lot about judgment lately, and then, this peanut butter dropped into my shopping basket.  All of the sayings and deep thoughts came to mind.   "Judging a book by its cover", "leaping to conclusions", "buyer beware", "not getting what you pay for", "buying what you're selling me"...and, ultimately, prejudice and first impressions fused together in my now, favorite jar of all time.  Here she is!  Chunky Peanut Spread?

I ask...do YOU see a single, precious nut chunk in there?  

Me?  I didn't see a one.  My son (a chunky young man himself -- very thin, but a Chunky Man) was much more inquisitive and open-minded.  He looked very closely and gave an additional test.  He raised the jar to his NOSE, and he smelled the peanut butter.  As a peanut butter connoisseur, and he is (well-initiated to the nuances of good peanut butter I may add), he said, "this is DEFINITELY chunky". Whoa.  Texture is not everything!

We have a split home.  Three chunky.  Three creamy.  So, this was easy.  We grabbed a "creamy jar" to compare.  We unscrewed the creamy and sure enough he was right!  Even without the chunks, chunky and creamy SMELL vastly different!!

You can read the label and feel deceived.  Duped.  Short-changed.  Maybe you even feel like the victim of a terrible lie.  Betrayed.  You can return to the store and insist on a replacement.  "Chunky!  I bought Chunky!"  You can write the company a note and hope for a crate of pure, unadulterated Chunky Spread in return for their negligence.  Shoot.  You could call a lawyer.  

Me?  Somehow, I loved this crazy jar.  If it was possible, I would have kept this jar forever.  A piece of art.  I'd call it "People Butter" and rest it in a very special spot.

The outside may lead to a certain determination or hasty conclusion, but remember it's all about what's INside.  And, even upon closer inspection,  peering into the "jar of People Butter", there may be some truth to what the label said all along.

For me, one thing IS for sure.  When I see Chunky Peanut Butter Spread...when I "buy what you're selling"...when you're advertising "chunky" all over?  

You better have the nuts.